GoodBye To You
by Lulubelle09
Summary: Dimitri pushes Rose away and leaves with Tasha. Can Rose except this? What will happen to her? Will he come back for her or is this really the end? Read to Find out :P *T for swearing and sexual content*
1. Chapter 1

_This will be alittle different from the books but will start at the point where Rose leaves the ball after the confrontion with her mum. Some of the past thing havn't happened and some things are out of place. If you get confused write me and I'll see what I can do to straighten it out._

_Enjoy and don't forget to let me know what you think! In other words REVIEW!_

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Rose sat down. She could just see the sun peaking its head up from over the clouds. Her internal thoughts wizzed around her head so fast not even she could tell what she was thinking, but there was a common theme, Dimitri.

She loved him with all her heart, she had given herself to him in every way possible but it didn't seem to matter. Maybe the saying '_Life isnt always fair'_ should be '_life isnt just not fair, but it likes to build your hope before smashing not fair upon you'_ she sighed and looked back at the sun rising upon the snowy mountian. She lent back closing her eyes as a tear leaked out.

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Dimitri watched as Rose was pulled from the hall by an irate Guardian Hathaway. He sighed and looked around, a few of the Moroi were looked at the spot that had previously been occupied by Rose and whispering at the lone figure that has been left behind. Dimitri noticed that Adrian looked shocked as he finished the remainer of his glass as headed toward the bar. He sighed again looking at the clock, 10 mintues until the end of his shift.

"Wow Guardian Hathaway did a number on her huh?" said the Guardian standing next to him, with a bemused look on his face,

Dimitri just nodded, he didn't like the look on the guardian's face,

"She sure looked hot though, right? I mean wow, no wonder her mum went spaz."

Dimitri nodded again, his mask in place

"you're her mentor right? Wouldn't mind a few training session with her" he said with a wink, wiggle of his eyebrows and a laugh

Dimitri was glad he had so much practice holding his mask on his face and his emotion in check, or he would a punched the guy in the face, as it was he raised his eyebrow at the man.

The guy seemed to get the hint as he resumed the silence they'd been in before. Looking back at the clock he sighed again, time was going slower then normal and he just wanted to see her. He knew that he shouldn't, that he needed to put distance between them but the hurt on her face cut him deep and he just wanted make sure she was okay.

With just a minute left and as his replacement approached he spoted Tasha also approaching. She waited to the side and as soon as he had finished the debrief with the replacement, he walked over to her.

"Hey Dimka, I guess you got prime seats to Rose's humiliation huh?" she said with a small laugh, I knew she didn't mean it in a mean way but I answered a little harshly anyway,

"Well who bought her that dress to begin with?"

Hurt flashed across her face as she gasped, "Oh my, I never meant to…" she lead off horrified that she had been the cause.

"It's not your fault, It was a beautiful dress" I felt bad for snaping at her, and sighed again and looked away, I seemed to be doing that a lot laterly.

She must have heard something in my voice as she pulled me further away from the entrace we had just walked out of, towards a sucluded courtyard.

"Dimka?" she asked "whats up, really?"

I looked at her, masked back on, "nothing."

"Dimka you're my best friend, I know something is wrong" she hesitated and looked around before continuing "is it … is it Rose? I know you're her mentor, but I cant help but feel.." she left her sentence drop off as she studied my face. I looked away. She gasped again,

"Dimitri" she said in a shocked and slightly disapproving voice, she never called me that always Dimka, crap I was in for it.

"What Natasha?" I said

"Tell me its not true, tell me your not sleeping with a student"

I glared at her dissapproving tone, "im not just _sleeping_ with a student, im in love with Rose" I snapped back.

"Oh Dimka," she said shaking her head "how could you" she turned and walked away from me leaving me in the freezing courtyard, I sat on a bench as looked towards the rising sun. Closing my eye I rested my head back against the wall.

**Like? Hate? Let me know! I've got the next few chapters already written so inspire me to update :P REVIEW**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys, next chapter is up. Sorry it too a while, i had it finished but something wasnt right so i kept mucking with it til it was what i wanted. Let me know what you think? Thanks to those who reviewed the last chapter, please review again and let me know. imnot very confiedent in my writing and you review help :D.**

**I DO NOT OWN VAMPIRE ACADEMY!  
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The next morning my thoughts were still in turmoil. I had come to two conclusions, I loved him and I had no idea what the hell was going on in my head anymore. Even though I was tired I got up and headed to the gym, no way was I gonna get anymore sleep and beating the shit out of something always made me feel better. I ran into Eddie on the way down and asked him to join me, all the better if that thing I was beating up hit back. As soon as we got there I ran a few laps to warm up and did some stretches, as soon as Eddie said he was ready we headed for the sparing ring. Two guardians had just finished so we didn't even have to wait to use it. The gym wasn't big so they only had one proper sparring ring.

"Just a warning Eddie, I'm in a bad mood. So I apologize if I hurt you" I said in my usual smartass tone with a smile.

"Bring it baby" he smiled back, winking at me

Oh my, he had no idea what he was in for.

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After a restless night I thought I'd hit the gym for a bit, to work off some on the confusion. As soon as I get there I see a small crowd around the sparring ring. I walk over to see what the fuss was about and boy did I get a hell of a shock. Fighting in the circle was Roza and one of her classmates, Eddie. While she looked beautiful and radiant with her hair slightly messed up and a few bruises on the skin I could see, Eddie did not. He looked roughed up. He was panting like anything and already had what looked like a promising black eye as well as a killer of a bruise on his arm. As I watched she delivered a leg sweep that sent him falling backwards out of the circle. A cheer went up with the few guardians that were watching. I hung to the back not wanting to be spotted by her.

Roza walked over to help her friend up,

"Another round?" She asked,

"Hell no" he smirked "whatever is up your ass you can worked it out without me" he laughed "getting my ass handed to me twice in a row is enough, I'm hitting the showers" he turned and headed towards the change rooms, with only a slight limp but I could have sworn I heard him mutter "and then the clinic"

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I landed a perfect leg sweep and watched as Eddie fell out of the circle. Damn I should have held back coz there is no way he's gonna spar with me again and I'm totally not done yet.

"Another round?" I asked hopefully smiling at him as I helped him up.

"Hell no" he smirked back as me "whatever is up your ass you can worked it out without me" he laughed "getting my ass handed to me twice in a row is enough, I'm hitting the showers" he turned and headed towards the change rooms.

I turned to face my gathered audience putting on my best man eater smile, "anyone takers?"

The group was small only around 8 people mainly older male guardians, who fidgeted uncomfortably looking like they didn't wanna fight a 17 year old girl novice, but there were one of two who looked at me thoughtfully.

"What don't tell me your scared to take me on" I pushed looking directly at one of the younger guys

He looked at his friends and who laughed and pushed him forwards,

"Great,"I smiled " I'm gonna grab a drink, get ready, I'll be right back" I walked towards the drink fountain smiling, this was gonna be fun.

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As she walked off to get a drink I saw the guardian that was going to spar with her, it was the one that had talked to me the night before, I gritted my teeth. I hope she kicked the crap out of him! Walking back she spotted me and her flushed face went blank but I could see anger in her eyes as well as determination. It was then I realized she was in one of her moods, and not a good one at that. I couldn't blame her; after all I had been so distant and cold towards her this last week. I was almost glad I wasn't the one facing her. As she walked into the circle she crouched into her defensive stance and smiled at her partner, "Let's start"

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Seeing him only added to the anger and confusion, and the desire to fight became stronger. I wanted to make him proud. Even after the way he's been treating me he is still my mentor and I wanted to prove myself. I took a deep breath as I drank and tried to clear my mind, but only succeed in drawing some of Lissa's darkness towards myself, oh hell, not what I needed. But I walked towards my new partner who looked smug. Well I was gonna have to mop the floor with that smug face now wasn't I. I crouched, I smiled "Let's start"

I guess he thought a good defense was a strong offence as he struck out at me. I dodged easily. I would let him try to get some hits in before I started my attack. This time he thought a kick would be better, **wrong**, I moved out of the way making sure I stayed within the circle at all times. I had held back with Eddie, not wanting to hurt him… much, but this guy I didn't know and with the added darkness to my already bad mood I was out for blood.

We danced around each other a little more, each looking for an opening. Again he tried a punch, this time to my ribs, I decided to counter attack. As his fist came towards me I blocked and landed a solid punch to his chest before darting out of his reach. I grinned as I heard his grunt, I was also vaguely aware of the noise from the spectators at success, but I refused to be distracted, my goal was in front of me and I would win if it killed me.

We circled a bit longer each hitting out, testing the other, sometimes connecting. It wasn't until he threw out a hurried and misplaced kick that decided to heat things up a bit. I grabbed his leg and twisted, causing him to lose balance, unfortunately as he was falling he grabbed at me and I went down to. No manner of blocking out could hide the up roar from the crowd. I scrambled to get back up but he was quicker, knocking me back down and attempting to climb on top trying to pin me. We grappled for a bit, but I had a plan. Slowly and unsuspectingly I wiggled my way closer to the line. I could see him getting cocky thinking he had me and I position myself so it look like I left a side open. He fell for my bluff with even hesitating and as he straddled me he smiled thinking he had one,

"Pinned ya" he said smugly

I just smiled in response and bucked him over my shoulders; out of the circle.

"Boo YEH!" I yelled getting up

"Round one to the girl" someone in the crowd shouted humor in this voice.

I looked over to my partner. He looked devastated. His friend was next to him laughing his ass off.

I walked over and punched his friend in the arm, hard enough to leave a bruise but I made it look casual and easy. That shut him up. Moving my gaze to my recent partner I asked his name.

"Ned" he said, smiling about my punching his friend

"Well Ned, thanks for a great match, maybe I'll see you round later" I shook his hand and walked off to get another drink. The sparring had only lasted around 10 minutes but it had worn me out. I looking at the gathered crowd which had a few new members, two of which I knew, but my eyes searching for his. When I found them I could see the pride in them, crap, he was walking over to me.

I finished off my drink, waiting for him to reach me,

"Nice moves Roza" he said

And that word pierced into my heart,

"Thanks" I responded, the rush from the fight left me abruptly as I turned and headed for the showers.

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I watched as they wrestled, Roze underneath but never letting him get fully on top of her. I could see the calculation in her eyes as the darted the edge of the circle. There were mummers through the watching guardians, some yelled support for the guy currently fighting my Roza, a few had small smiles on their faces these were the ones I knew had seen her strategy. When she was in the perfect position her left her side open and he fell straight into her trap,

"Pinned ya" he said pinning her arms on either side of her face as he straddled her

I could see her smile and the moment of puzzlement on his face before he went flying over her head out of the circle.

"Boo YEH" she yelled getting up

Those gathered were all smiling or laughing. I watched as she walked towards her partner and his friend.

"I see you've taught her well"

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	3. Chapter 3

_Hey sorry for the late update, i just couldnt get the wording right... Anyway it would really help if you let me know your opion of how the emotions come across in the part with tasha... PLEASE... what can i say im needy. Anyway i have like 10 people who get alerts so THANK YOU to them and please if each of you can just post a review so i know who to shout out to next time? Please every try to review if you can, it lets me know how my story is being recieved. ENJOY! (sorry for the shortness, the next one will be longer i think.)_

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I turned to look at one of old mentors and friend, James.

"Oh hey, didn't see you there" I said to him. He was a few years older than me and had worked his way up to a high standing among the guardians.

"I heard you'd taken on a protégé in Rosemarie Hathaway, but I couldn't understand it. Now I do. That girl has potential and talent." He nodded towards where Roza was getting a drink. "As long as she doesn't pull anymore stunts she's gonna go far" he clamped my on the shoulder supportively before walking away.

I started towards her,

"Nice moves Roza" I said beaming with pride, but as that last word came out I saw her whole being constrict. Her flushed face that had shun with victory one second was blank as she said thanks, turned and walked towards the girls changing rooms….Shit.

I didn't have long to think about it as my phone beeped and a message from Tasha came up

'_Come to my room? Need to talk. Free from now til 2. – Tasha'_

I sighed; guess I had to get this over and done with as I walked towards where she was staying.

She opened the door and stepped back to let me in,

"Thanks for coming Dimka" she said but her smile didn't reach her eyes "please sit down" she pointed to the arm chairs that sat around a small coffee table in the corner of her room.

"So whats up Tasha?" I asked guardedly

"Dimka, I want you to leave the academy and become my guardian." she stated bluntly

I stared at her in shock, "what?"

"You're my best friend and I've been thinking about it for a while. I admit maybe I want more than just a guardian/charge relationship but at this moment that's irrelevant."

All I could do was stare at her. She wanted me to leave Roza and be with her? She must have read my expression as she continued quickly,

"Dimka, its not just about that. I just can't leave knowing you're having a relationship with a student."

I kept my face blank

"God Dammit Dimitri, she's only 17! This could ruin her, this could ruin you!" she all but yelled at me "you'll be thrown in jail if anyone finds out. You'll lose your Guardian title." she added in a calmer voice

"It's not like that" I tried to reason with her "I love her, I really do and she loves me!" Even as complicated as it was at the moment I knew that fact would always be true.

"She's a child!" her voice raising again

"She is not a child," I glared at Tasha "she's been through more that most people"

"Yes she has! She acts strong but there is a lot going on under that and she doesn't need you messing around with her" her tone was sharp

"Dimka, think about it, she's 17. She's been on the run since she was 15, never feeling safe and supporting Lissa the whole time. You made her safe again, took away that responsibility, gave her back her life. Are you sure she isn't confusing her feelings? You're her mentor, it isn't right. You need to leave before you do something that can't be taken back or fixed"

"It's too late for that" I muttered

*slap*

I was stunned, Tasha slapped me. Not that it hurt but still.

"What have you done to that poor girl!" she spat at me

"I LOVE HER" I shouted

"It doesn't matter"

"Yes it does" but her message was beginning to sink in

"I've stopped that type of relationship with her. She's just my student now. I'm going to wait for her to graduate and settle down into Guarding the Princess. Then I'll ask her out again." I sighed

"But will you be able to maintain that?" she asked sadly. I knew she could see it hurt me but she wasn't giving up. I guess Rose brings that out in certain people.

I sat there looking at nothing thinking, I loved her so much, but was Tasha right? Was it real for her? Would this ruin her? James said she had a promising future a head as long as she kept out of trouble, if this was found out would it count against her too? I sighed and looked at Tasha again.

"I'll think about it" I stood up and walked over to the door but before I was fully out Tasha called to me, I didn't stop but I paused in the door frame,

"You have a week, either stop contact with her or leave with me for the time being. You're my best friend but I won't have you hurting her."

I closed the door behind me and headed back to me room, shit what had I gotten myself into.

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_Hope you liked it, and as i begged before REVIEW. _


	4. Chapter 4

_Hey guys, sorry if my updates seem irregular, i meant to have a system but i keep forgetting and yet. ANYWAY so i have 16 ppl who have alerts on this story, Thanks to those guys but sadly even though i begged for those ppl to leave me a review letting me know how they like the story only 3 ppl did. Come on guys PLEASE out of the 16 of you i should be able to get atleast 6 NEW reviews before i post my next update (im not holding it ransom coz i think thats alittle weird just saying that 6 reviews in the next few days should be do-able). Please let me know, i think my story is pretty kewl, well written and interesting but i want to know if you guys do coz thats the important thing! Okay so let me know your thoughts on this chapter (or any other chapters). YOU ALL ROCK!_

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I walked into the shower, turning the hot tap up full, allowing the boiling water to scorch my skin and the steam to bellow until I could hardly breathe. I stood there with my eyes closed, trying to stop the tears and sobs that were struggling to break free of me, and allowed myself to just feel the pain and warmth of the shower.

"Rose?" called a voice

"Yeah?" I responded, I had no idea how long I had stood there it could have been a minute or an hour

"Rose, what are you doing?" the voice came again

I sighed and turned the water off, stepping out to find a slightly annoyed best friend staring at me

"Geez Liss, if you wanted to look you just had to ask" I threw at her with a smile as I saw her blush and look away, I turned away from her to grab my towel

"What the hell Rose?" she shrieked at me

"Ummm I dunno? What the hell Liss?" I responded confused, I was already getting tired of this; I just wanted to be alone with my thoughts

"Your back" she said and I looked over my shoulder towards the full wall mirror. Ah shit, between my shoulders where the water had been hitting was covered in small blisters and the length on my back was red and angry. Shit.

"It's nothing" I answered pulling my bra and shirt on quickly.

Lissa just sat there in silence while I finished getting dressed.

"So what brings you to the training room locker room my sweet?" I asked, trying to get her thoughts away from my burnt back.

"I went to your room and you weren't there the next logical place was the food court and when I got there I heard talk that a girl novice was kicking the shit out of her partner and headed down here to see you." She laughed and threw my socks at me; I sat down to put them on.

"When I got here I asked a Guardian and he pointed me in here, said you had just headed in."

So I hadn't been in there that long, damn well I guess a few minutes of numbness were better than nothing, even if the blisters were starting to sting a little.

"So what did you wanna talk about?" I asked looking over at her, she looked upset, "is everything okay? Are you feeling the darkness effects again? Did someone hurt you? Christian? I'll kill him" I sprang into protection mode.

"No," she said looking at me with a small smile "I wanted to ask you if you were okay" she only slightly stressing the word _you_.

"I'm fine, why?" I asked trying to look innocent; did she know something was up with me and Dimitri?

"Well last night with your mum" she looked sheepishly at me

Oh that, I hadn't even given it a single thought but I guess it was better than her knowing the truth.

"Yeah well you know, whatever it's not like she had any right anyway" I guess I was more hurt by it than I thought

"Hey, why don't we spend the day in my room with take out, chocolate and a few good movies" she said happily like it would solve the world's problems. It's just one of the things I love about her, her naivety.

"Yeah sounds great, lead the way" I threw in a fake laugh and smile and soon we were on her couch with some Chinese watching the Hangover. I tried to focus on the movie but, like a broken record, the word Dimitri keep running threw my head.

For the last two weeks he has been treating me just like another student. We had a wonderful night in the cabin and then BOOM he's back to being my mentor and nothing else. I can still see the love and want behind his eyes but nothing I do can bring it out. I don't want to think that he used me but it keeps being thrown around by that annoying voice in my head. I love him with everything I had and it's killing me to be ignored.

Maybe if I just hold out til graduation it will change, I mean I'm 17 and he could get fired or even thrown in jail if anyone found out. Or maybe it's Tasha? I know they're close. He's different around her. But she came a week into the cold shoulder. Did he know she was coming and decided to brush me off? ARGH! I just know I'm gonna drive myself crazy with all these thoughts. But maybe I was on to something with Tasha. Maybe he feels for her what I feel for him, star crossed lovers. She a Moroi, a royal at that, so he has no chance of being with her because of society. OMG maybe I'm the rebound chick, I'm his mason. Now that she's around he wants to be available in case she decided she wants him.

Shit! I feel like the missing pieces are falling into place, like my heart is breaking. I can't blame her, It's not like it's her fault, she's so nice but she can give him things I can't. I want to hate her and a small part of me does, but mostly I just feel sad and numb. She doesn't know about me in his life so if she is after him she doesn't even realize she's trying to steal him away from me. If that's the case then I'll have to let him go, as much as it pains me, I love him too much to let him settle for second best, even if that was second was me.

I was brought out of my thoughts by a pillow hitting me head and whipped round to face a smiling Lissa,

"Not smart babe" I said as I sprung at her, pinning her as she wiggled beneath me trying to escape

"I think your payback will be" pausing to let the suspense kick in "tickling!" and soon we were both laughing

It felt good to laugh and be carefree even if it was only for a while. After we were all laughed out we just lay there, next to each other in silence. Sighing I helped Lissa up and gave her a hug

"Thanks for always know just what to do" I said

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**_Hands up who thought that it was Dimitri coming to sneak into her shower at the start? Also you thoughts on Rose's thoery about her situation with Dimitri being like Tasha's and Dimitri's (eg. star crossed lovers) :D As always Hit that button below and REVIEW! _**


	5. Chapter 5

_Hey guys, sorry I got really stuck on how this should go… I kept changing my mind on how Rose would react and how Dimitri would tell her and what not. BUT finally I am happy with this… please tell me you are too :P! As always please REVIEW… didn't get as many as I thought I would last time which got me a little disheartened… ANYWAY… so there will be changes of view in here that I feel are self explanatory, but if you don't think so let me know and I will clarify/start adding names before each change. Here it is, R&R people!_

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When I got back to my room there was a note slipped under my door,

_Training session at 8.  
- D_

I sighed and glanced at the clock by my bed 3 hours until he wanted me and I was exhausted. I had so much food with Lissa I knew I wouldn't be hungry, but I'd need another shower and some time to get ready. After setting my alarm for 2 hours I lying down in bed and instantly fell asleep

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I sat in the chair just outside the gym waiting. I glanced at the wall clock again, 8.15. Trust her to be late. I wondered if she even got the note. She hadn't been there when I dropped it off, what if she was still out? Who was she out with?

I looked down the hall she would be coming from for the hundredth time, and saw her walking towards me. The sight of her in her cropped work out top and tight ¾ made my heart hurt. I just wanted to hold her like I once had and promise her the world. But I couldn't so I shook the idea from my head and pulled up my mask, I was going to tell her about Tasha's proposal tonight. It was the fair thing to do, I didn't know if I would take it or not but it would hurt her less if she knew before hand. It was just a job proposal I reminded myself for the 30th time, not like I was cheating on her. I didn't know how she would react but maybe I'd hold off telling her until after we sparred. She packed quite a punch when she was mad. Actually maybe we wouldn't spar at all, she did that this morning so tonight we would work on her strength.

"Hey Comrade" she said smiling sweetly "how did you know just what I was in the mood for" it was her tone that made up my mind on the not sparring notion.

I held the door to the gym open and watched as she dumped her bag on a bench and started stretching. She was such a smart arse it almost made me smile

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Training was hard. First I had to run laps, easy but it allowed me more time to think on my latest theory of why I was being ignored by my love. Weights; again the same problem, while my muscle was working hard nothing else was. I tried to steam the unwanted thoughts by talking to Dimitri but he wasn't as responsive as I would have hoped so I concentrated on pushing myself through heavier weights then I usually lifted. When we were finished my body hurt all over but it was the good kind of hurt. Plus it gave me something to focus on that wasn't the awkward silence that had fallen over the last 30 minutes. It was during my cool down when I was stretching out on the mats that he finally broke the silence.

"Roza?" he asked, I looked up from stretching out my calves,

"Tasha offered me a position as her guardian. She's going to be at increased levels of danger for a while with her work and she has requested my help."

He looked away when saying this so I wasn't certain of what emotions were going on behind his eyes but his voice was steady and collected. I moved on to another stretch purposely choosing one that were my head was laying on my leg so he would not see the tears that threatened to fall. I couldn't help the vulnerability in my voice as the words tumbled out without command,

"what about me?"

I composed my face as I switched legs, not allowing one tear to fall. I was horrified that I had spoken but I would not make it worse with tears. Rose Hathaway does not cry!

"well, if you thought that you still needed me here as a mentor that I would stay. But you're ahead in all your combat classes and I only just beat you the last few times we fought."

"I'll always need you" I whispered, looking up.

He wasn't looking away from me but he wasn't looking me in the eye either, so I wasn't sure if he heard it or not and his face did not change.

The remaining stretches were done in silence and when I had composed myself enough that I was certain regardless of what came next I would not break, so I stood up facing him.

"Whatever you think is best" I said without feeling, my guardian mask pulled on tight "They Come First." I turned away to grab my jumper and my bag and went to leave but he caught me arm,

"Roza?"

"Don't" I said pulling my arm away but not facing him, "just don't. Let me know when you decide"

The next few days flew past in a haze. I didn't see Dimitri once and it was all I could think of. I barely slept and when I did it was either filled with nightmares of Dimitri tearing out my heart or by Adrian's Dream walking. Even he seemed to realize something was up but I blew off his concerns, focusing instead on my man eater attitude.

Lissa was growing worried but I blamed it on my mother and stress and a whole range of thing that she was so confused it would have been funny, if I had felt like laughing. I went through the motions with her and Christian and Eddie and Mason, joking and acting up but underneath all I could feel was pain.

Finally 3 days later, on the last day before we departed for the academy, Dimitri stopped me in the hall way.

"Rose, can I have a moment?" his guardian mask was flawless and gave away nothing, which was a bad sign.

"sure thing" I didn't throw in my usual nickname for him, the situation seemed to serious for that and my heart felt like it was being lead to the execution block.

We caught the elevator up to the Guardian's level and he lead me into what I assumed was his room as there was a battered western novel on the nightstand. Looking around I noticed nothing was packed and the blood drained from my whole body as the axe came down.

I turned around with tear in my eyes and as he shut the door I threw myself against him, arms around his neck and lip upon his. He caught me out of reflex but still his lips moved with mine but after a few second turned his head away and let me drop.

"No, Rose I'm leaving"

"I know" I responded looking away as I blinked back tears, "I know" I said again "just give me this" I said as the tears I unsuccessfully try to get rid of streamed down my face. And I pulled his face down to meet mine. Our kiss was full with urgency, love and pain. He pushed me down on the bed never breaking contact. As goodbye kisses went it was heartbreaking.

After what seemed like eternity, I straddled him pinning his arms above his head. I pulled back and looked at him, he had tears in his eyes too, I studied his face trying to imprint it into my memory. Slowly I leant in to give him one last soft kiss and then pulled myself away, getting up with tears falling heavily down my face I walked towards the door. I glanced back before opening the door, he was still in the same position I had left him in but I could see sadness and pain etched into his face.

"Goodbye Comrade" I whispered as I walked away not looking back.

**Did you guys like it? Let me know PLEASE! Coz you had to wait so long i've got an extra little bit to post so yay for you two chapter in one day. Thanks for reading!**


	6. Chapter 6

_An extra little Chapter because i took soooo long to decide where i wanted to story to go. Hope you liked her responce and their departure scene. _

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It was in the guest bathroom in the foyer of the building that I came apart. I barely managed to get into a cubical before my emotions overwhelmed me. It felt like my heart was literally being ripped out, my chest hurt so much. I smothered my sobs with my jumper as I sat on the toilet with my knees drawn up for my head to rest on. I cried and cried until the sobs stopped and I slowly was able to breath again. The pain didn't stop though. When I felt I could move I stepped out to face the mirrors. My face was a mess, streaked with tear, pale and blotchy. My Eyes red and puffy, my nose red and slightly running, my lips swollen and red. The only comfort was I looked nowhere near as horrible as I felt, actually no, that wasn't a comfort because I looked like death. Sighing I washed my face and tried to compose myself as best I could.

I still had 40 minutes until I need to be at the airstrip so I decided to walk the long way hoping the cold air and snow would clear my head a little and allow me to be completely composed by the time I arrived. It must have worked because by the time I got there I was completely numb. I felt nothing. I still had 20 minutes so I grabbed a burger and drink from the airstrip café, but it was mostly for something to do, I wasn't hungry.

I was picking at chips when Eddie and Mason sat down beside me. I shoved the uneaten burger into the middle and watched them fight over it. I knew I should have found it funny but I didn't, so I faked a smile and sat back sipping my drink to cover my lack of response. Both boys were too keyed up to notice much but Mason did give me a look, to which I just smiled and said I was tired.

With a few minutes to spare we joined the line of students boarding the plane. Lissa had saved me a seat so I went a sat next to her. She was sitting with Christian and surprisingly Adrian. I was too lost in myself to pay much attention but I did notice his eyes cloud with concern when I sat down but as he didn't say anything I closed my eye and settled into the numb hole that was my feelings, but as the plane took off it felt like my heart was being ripped from my chest, I would not see the man I loved again. I refused to cry though, why should i? Yes he tore out my heart but if he wanted to leave then fine, no skin of my nose right? Wrong but whatever. I was Rose Hathaway, badass extraordinary. I was stronger than this. And I would be. Starting now I was over Dimitri Belikov! And with that I shut away all feelings and brought forward my sarcastic, badass attitude to become my new mask.

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It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. My heart felt like it was leaving with her and I didn't have the energy to move so I just lay there crying like a child. A beeping alerted me to the time and I looked out my window, which ironically face the direction of the airstrip and I saw in the distance the plane ascending, taking my Roza back to the academy, without me.

After a shower I went to the training room. Most of the school students had left that morning, with Roza's school being the last to go, so the training room was empty. I hit the weight machines, using the strain on my muscles as a way to control the sadness. Roza would be graduating in 8 months I reminded myself. 8 months until I can claim her as my own again, 35 weeks, 245 days. After finishing my work out I went back upstairs to bed, staring as the only picture I had of Roza until I fell into a dreamless sleep.

**Thanks for reading, hope you like! Review PLEASE i would really like atleast 10 to 15.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey All. Yay its only been 10 days! I've been hoping to update every week to 2 weeks. How did you find my last chapter? No-one really reviewed so I'm not sure. I felt it was really good, and hopefully emotional but I would really love to know what you all think! Please just it takes two seconds and really brightens my day as well as lets me know that you guys actually want more. I mean if this story that I just read can get 100 reviews when I found it to be juvenile and underwritten then I'd hope mine can get a few more! **

It was the morning after we returned to the academy and classes had started so we were in the cafeteria sitting at our usual table, Lissa, Christian, Eddie, Mason and surprisingly Adrian. My new persona was working well, I had only cried for an hour last night in the shower and the throbbing pain had been incased so it was down to a dull pain instead of what felt like an open knife wound.

All round me they were talking and since I hadn't really said much so I guess Lissa was trying to include me in the conversation when she asked,

"So Rose, Where is Dimitri. I didn't see him on the plane back here."

I was shocked. And instantly stiffened, the shell I had constructed over my feeling cracking slightly and the pain shot up to knife wound level again for a split second, but I held it together.

"Didn't he tell you? He left." I said bitchily, "Tasha asked him to stay with her" again I was proud of how strong my voice sounded, but I didn't want to stay around to answer anymore question so I grabbed my bags and stood up "gotta run, sorry" and headed out.

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As Rose ran out I turned to look at Christian despair on my face.

"Did you know about this?" I asked him

"No, Sweety, you know I would have told you if I did" he answered rubbing his hands up and down my arms.

"But, he's my guardian?"I was so confused. Rose and Dimitri were close with him being her mentor and he was already assigned to me, how could he just leave? I was tired of the people leaving, but this time I was defiantly going to find out why.

"Do you have Tasha's number?" I asked "I need to call her" and when he gave me the number I walked back to my room to call her not caring I would be late for class.

*_Bring bring*_  
"Hello, Natasha speaking" came the voice from the phone

"Hi, Tasha, it's Lissa" while this plan had seemed great before she had answered it was suddenly seeming like a very silly idea,

"Lissa? Are you okay sweetheart?" came her response.

"Yeah, ummm I was just wondering why you took Dimitri away? I mean I guess you needed a guardian and all but ummmm why did you take mine?" I knew I sounded like a childish brat but it kinda hurt. I had no family and I thought because he was going to be my guardian for the rest of my life I he would become like mine, as Rose had.

Tasha seemed to understand because her response was full was reassurance, "No, sweetheart, I didn't take him. He's still going to be your Guardian; I just need to borrow him for a few months that's all. The queen couldn't spare any and as you're so well protected there I called him on a favor. He'll be back before you graduate."

To say I was relieved was an understatement. "Thanks Tasha. Sorry to call out of the blue and all"

After some pleasantries and apologies I hung up and ran to class.

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Still reeling from the mention of Dimitri I began to wander towards my first class, Stan was going to have a heart attack when I was early but i didn't get very far before I ran into Headmaster Kirova who was walking with a Moroi student I had never seen before.

"Rosemarie, I'm glad I ran into you. This is Amber, she just transferred here. Why don't you show her around and to her first Moroi class. Here's a late pass. Sorry Deary" she said to the new girl "but I have some things that I need to take care of." And with that she headed back to her office.

"Wow, is she always like that?" the new girl, Amber said "I mean she literally ditched me on the first person she saw, and she'd already pre-written a pass"

I just laughed, "yeah she's always like that" I said taking a moment to get a good look at the new girl. She had perfect strawberry blonde ringlets and like all Moroi was pale but that just enhanced her dark brown eyes and pale pink lips. She was a little taller than Lissa and had the same figure. Her clothing and jewelry spoke of wealth and royalty and I had almost dismissed her as another pain in the ass royal when she spoke again,

"so, what was your name again" she said with a smile "I didn't quite get it? And I don't actually know anyone here."

"Rose, and your Amber, right?" I clarified

She smiled at me, then looked around taking in a deep breath

"this is all so strange to me" she said seeming a little scared

"Hey, don't worry about it. You'll figure this place out in no time" I smiled back at her "Now let me look at your timetable and I'll show you around and then to your class. If you want we can walk extra slow, Kirova never said I had to get you there on time" I smirked and winked at her, thinking she would be horrified but instead she smiled and chuckled

"You're def my type of girl" she said "lets walk real slowly" and off we went laughing.

I showed her the classrooms, commons and then looped back to the now empty cafeteria and showed her the table where we sat,

"At lunch time come sit here, I should be here but if not just tell them Rose sent you and you'll be all good" I told her and again she laughed agreeing to meet there at lunch. I walked her back to the classrooms and dropped her off at her class. Walking through the empty hallways I gathered my game face as I walked into Stan Alto's class halfway thru.

"Sorry I'm late" I said as soon as I opened the door, I'd decided that I would arrive in style.

"And what makes you think you can come in half way thru one of my classes?" he asked

"Headmaster needed me to do some stuff. She gave me a pass" I held it up, making him have to walk over the door.

He snatched the note and checked it over, probably looking to see if it was real, and waved me past him towards my seat.

"Miss Hathaway, maybe you can answer the question I had just asked Mr Ashford before you rudely interrupted."

"Nope" I said popping the p "probably can't" I smiled up at him as I took my seat and gathered my books. As the class resumes i started doddling on a blank page in my book,

"Miss Hathaway, Maybe you could explain what exactly your doing?" came I voice from behind me

"Stuff" I answered in a bored voice not even pausing from my drawing even though he was standing behind me. After a moment he continued whatever it was he had been doing but I didn't pay attention.

The classes until lunch seemed to blur and as soon as the lunch bell rang I was out of there, grabbing Mason and Eddie as I went and pulling them towards the lunch line. I wasn't really sure if Amber would show up. She was Moroi and they didn't tend to be friendly towards Dhampir's with the exception of Lissa and Christian. I grabbed my food and headed to the table, seeing Adrian already seated there.

"Geez stalking much?" I asked

"It's not stalking if you're invited Little Dhampir" he responded but he was studying me again and it made me nervous. Eddie, Mason and I sat down opposite him.

"What the hell are you staring at?" I shot back annoyed. That seemed to snap him out of whatever trance he'd been in.

"You" he said sexily smiling at me "can't a guy admire what a perfect specimen you are"

I merely flipped him off and took a bit of my roll, Eddie and Mason laughed. Lissa and Christian had just sat down when Amber walked over

"Hi Rose" she said sitting down

"Hey guys, this is Amber. Amber this is Lissa, Christian, Eddie, Mason and Adrian" I pointed them out as I spoke their name. She looked questioning at Adrain so I spoke again. "Yeah he's not a student here, just tagging along to make everyone's life hell" I smiled at him as I said this and he quibbled back "Not hell, little dhampir, fun. Everyone need a little Adrian in their lives" I was starting to enjoy our banter so I came back with "As long as your 'Little' Adrian isn't in anything other than our lives" and with that Amber, Christian, Eddie and Mason broke down in laughter. Even Adrian chuckled before going back to eating. Lissa looked at me, rolled her eyes and started eating her lunch, I could feel the disapproval through our bond but I took no notice of it.

The rest of the week passed like that, classes where I would hardly pay attention and used any excuse to make a sarcastic remark or attempt to belittle the teacher. Rumor flew around about me, other student backed away. Lunch with my friends as usual but I had started to gravitate towards Amber and Adrian. It was fun to banter with them and the three of us enjoyed making trouble. Eddie and Mason joined in a fair bit but often we would push past their limits. The only class that I excelled in was Combat. After a few days it became apparent that I was of another level as I had beaten every classmate, often easily. The watching Guardians took turns sparing with me, each teaching me new techniques and offering me an escape for my hidden pain turned aggression. After classes I would hit the gym for extra training. Running laps and doing weights as I would have been with Dimitri. It was only in this time where I allowed myself to miss him. It gave me extra strength to push harder and i welcomed the pain that followed.

When the weekend came I was excited. No more class and more time to doing what I loved, training. Straight after school I hit the gym. I worked hard with the weight, pushed myself further when I ran and took out a lot of my aggression on the punching bags. After two hard hours I hit the showers and got read to head to Adrian's room where I was meeting Lissa and the gang for a movie. As usually Lissa picked a crappy romance and my shell couldn't take it. Out of desperation I followed Adrian into the kitchen, away from the TV.

"What's up" he asked as he poured himself a drink out of a shaker.

"Nothing" I responded as I stole Adrian's drink downing it one shot,

"Hey, that was mine!"

"Shut up and pour me another" I snapped at him, this time he poured two and we clinked glasses as we downed the new drinks.

We started talking as he set about making another batch of highly alcoholic drinks. This time I didn't down them in one but I didn't exactly take it slow either. Two drinks in Amber came into the kitchen.

"Okay, who forgot to tell me the party was in the kitchen" she asked grabbing what was left of my drink out of my hands and slam it down quickly.

"Hey! MINE" I said laughing

"What goes around comes round" Adrian shot back at me before laughing with us.

So it turns out Amber was a party girl, mix that with Adrian and my own party spirit you had a problem.

A few more rounds and some hilarious stories from both Amber and Adrian, while trying to keep myself from falling out of the chair from laughing, Lissa came into the kitchen looking cross.

"If you didn't want to watch the movie all you had to do was say" she huffed

"Chill Liss, nothing to be mad at" I said getting up to hug her but unfortunately I tripped and ended up taking her down with me

"OMG Rose" Lissa squealed and we both laughed.

"Wait rose are you drunk!" all I could do in response was giggle, which sent Adrian and Amber into laughing fits.

"I'm not too bad, sorry I fell on you."

She was now standing near the door with Christian who had helped her up, but left me sitting on the floor

"Want a drink?" I offered smiling

She looked a little hesitant, Lissa had never been that big on drinking unlike I had.

"Maybe just one" she said looking to Christian who nodded and they joined us sitting round the bench in the kitchen as Adrian poured two more drink.

"Since when do you drink anyway Rose?" she asked

"I dunno just felt like it, it's been a tough week" I responded looking away.

After some more talking and a few laughs, Lissa and Christian we ready to go,

"Rose we're heading off wanna walk with us?" they asked but I refused for the first time in a week there was no pain inside my heart just the bliss of fog.

"Nah I think the party's just started" I said back pointing to where Amber was dancing to the radio with Adrian watching from the couch.

"You sure Rose, I think you should probably get back to your dorm Curfew is in 30mins" Lissa said pointedly but I was having too much fun to stop now.

"Chill out Lissa, Amber's still here and I'm having fun for once " I told her back getting a little annoyed

"Come on Lissa, Rose is a big girl she can handle herself" Christian said, I guess he didn't like m tone, then turned and steered Lissa from Adrian's place neither looking back.

For a second I wondered if I should go home but then Amber called to me to dance with her and thought 'what the hell' and went to join her, but not before grabbing another drink.

**I thought I'd give you a longer chapter to make up for my other shorter ones. How did you find it? There was a bit in there I didn't think worked as well as it could have but I'd changed it so many time and it just never sounded perfect so let me know if it read okay? Also what do you think about Amber? For those missing Dimitri don't worry he'll be back in a little while, be more worried about when he'll come back to :P. So REVIEW and let me know your thoughts!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey guys! Here's your latest UD and in only 5 days. Hope you enjoy it! Thanks to those you did review, the rest of you PLEASE let me know what your thoughts are coz there are scenes that I think are good that you all might not agree with and I want to know this.**

**I've forgotten the disclaimer on a few of my last ones so here it is : I do not own Vampire Academy or any of the character that I am writing about (except Amber).**

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The next morning I woke to a killer of a hang over, and was surprised to see I was still as Adrian's, and that it was not in fact morning but afternoon. Looking around I saw Amber passed out on the other couch but Adrian was nowhere to be seen. I stumbled around to the kitchen to get a glass of water and Panadol, after setting an extra glass and two pills next to Amber I scribbled a note to say I went back to my room to change and shower and would see them at dinner.

It was Saturday and a nice night so the outdoor areas were busy and I tried to look as inconspicuous as I could while walking back to my dorm but as I entered the Dhampir building I was stopped by Eddie and Mason.

"WOW looks like someone partied it up last night" a loud voice said into my ear. I turned to glared at the culprit only to see Mason smirking at me out of arms reach.

"Argh, not so loud" I muttered swatting at him

"Oh Hathaway your too easy" Eddie laughed at me

"I may be hungover but I will kick your ass if you don't leave me to my shower" I growled at them as they laughed

"Well princess after your shower wanna meet up and go to dinner" Mason asked smiling at me, I knew he liked me and to be honest I liked him too just not in a serious way and not with even a 100th of the intensity that I loved Dimitri. Great now to add to the pounding of my head was the breaking of my heart as I remembered Dimitri was gone.

"Sure whatever I'll be down in an hour or two"

"Oh and Hathaway" Eddie called after me "now that the Party Queen is back her presence is require tonight, txt you the details" he winked at me as I turned to head back to my room

I knew I shouldn't, I had a responsibility to Lissa and to being the best Guardian I could be but screw it I had a life too and right now mine needed as much reckless fun as I could manage. When I got the detailed I responded asking if I could bring some friends and when he said I could I forwarded the text to Adrian, Amber, Christian and Lissa's phones, then went to take the best shower of my life.

I meet the boys in the lobby and we headed to dinner together, catching up with Amber in line and all moving to the same table. As we sat down Amber was filling the boys in on our impromptu party last night. As they were laughing at some of our antics Adrian sat down next to me,

"Well hello there Little Dhampir, I enjoyed last night" he smirked at me

I groaned unsure of what part he was talking about, the part where I pretty much gave him a lap dance or the part where after spilling something on Ambers top and having her take it off she took mine off too.

"Shut it Adrian"

"No I really enjoyed seeing that side of you. Plus your aura's clearer" he sounded sincere but I could still hear the slight double meaning,

"Not in the mood Adrian" I punch his shoulder and went back to eating.

I was half way through my plate when Lissa and Christian sat down at the table

"You too up for tonight?" I asked

"No, sorry Rose but we already had plans" Lissa answered looking away, great looks like she was getting lucky tonight. Good thing alcohol numb the bond, and I was gonna be drinking extra so I wouldn't be pulled into her head when I didn't wanna be.

We finished dinner with comfortable talk and planning. The party was in one of the abandoned cabins, not THE cabin, but one that was closer to the main area, apparently the head office cabin. It started an hour after curfew so we had to plan a way to all get there without being seen. Eddie, Mason and I would meet on the roof of the Dhampir building. Amber and Adrian were gonna stay together in his room which backed on to the forest so they would just need to get into the darkness the trees provided and head to the meeting point. From there we would head to the party together.

"Good luck" Lissa whispered to me as she left with Christian, who snorted a said "Yeah be safe" to which I replied "yeah you too" with a wink. Lissa and Christian turned red but the rest of us laughed. There was still three hours til curfew so I headed to Adrian's with Amber. We turned on a movie, this one with lots of action, and opened some premixed drinks. Half an hour before curfew and just a little past tipsy I walked back to my dorm, making sure the matron saw me so she wouldn't check my room later, and started to get ready.

Mason, Eddie and I had escaped our rooms to the roof so many time it was as easy as taking the stair, though I hadn't tried sneaking out in a extremely short shimmer black halter dress and black heels before {**link to pic's on profile**}. I loved this dress and it looks HOT on me, hence why lissa bought it for me on our last shopping trip. I can still remember the way _his _eye popped when I came out of the change room in it. Shaking my head I cleared the memory from my head and hurried to meet the boys so my night of fun and forgetting could begin.

Getting us all to the party was easy. I had always had a knack for slipping around the patrolling guardians and the closer we got the more excited I was. As we approached I could feel the music beating through me and all I wanted to do was dance. Amber seemed to be of the same mind as me and together we grabbed each other and ran for the dancing area. But before we could get there Adrian was dragging us to get drinks. It felt good that people were watching me, boys heads turned and mouths dropped. At least some guys seemed to want me. After doing 3 rounds of shots with Adrian, Eddie, Mason and Amber we could finally hit the dance floor. Amber and I paired up and we got a few wolf whistles and cat calls from our outfits and the provocative way we danced together. Amber's dress was even sluttier than mine; it was silvery grey, a boob tube, tight and short. The time seemed to fly past with Eddie, Mason or Adrian always appearing with a new drink as soon as one of our drinks was empty. I'm not sure how it happened but soon I was dirty dancing with Mason and then he was leading me away from the party towards the shadows of the trees. I giggled as I stumbled along behind him and as soon as we were far enough away from the party that we could not be easily seen he pushed me back against a tree and he was kissing me. In a distant part of my brain I knew this wasn't right, that I'd regret it in the morning and that Dimitri would be ashamed of my behavior but that thought just spurred me on. I pulled him harder against myself and let go. His hands were moving all over me and his mouth would alternate between my mouth and neck. It felt wrong and right at the same time and I just stopped thinking and let myself react. It seemed like forever when I heard Adrian's worried voice ring through the tress.

"Rose! ROSE!"

He seemed worried so I pushed Mason mouth away from my mouth as I shouted back,

"Over Here!"

"Thank God" came his reply

We were only a few trees in so he got to us pretty quickly

"Rose what the hell" he yelled when he stumbled across us, me with my legs wrapped around Mason boosted against the tree, him mouth at my neck hands roaming.

Mason seemed to relies we had company and jumped backwards, I tried to get my legs from around him but all the happened is we ended up tangled on the forest floor

"Shit" I mumbled as I tried to detangle myself and get up. Mason managed it fine, he seemed to spring up, but as soon as I was up the world was spinning and I was down again

"Crap" I muttered

"Rose!" the both cried as tried again, and for a third time I was on my ass. This def was not fun! By this time both Mason and Adrian decided to help me and pulled me up. Once I was up they both grabbed hold as I started to sway.

"Urgh I'm just gonna sit down for I bit, Okay?" I said when the world still hadn't righted itself.

"What did you want anyway Adrian" I asked though I had a nagging suspicion that it didn't come out as clearly as I thought it had.

"Oh I couldn't find you, Amber hadn't seen your for like an hour and you looked pretty trashed last time I saw you so I was worried someone might be trying to take advantage of you" As he said this last part he glared at Mason. I couldn't help but giggle.

"Hey, don't look at me like that she started it" Mason muttered but he did look slightly guilty

"Why don't you can go back and find the other then lead them here?" Adrian asked Mason "We were all worried and split up to find Rose" he explained when Mason seemed confused.

"I doubt she'll be able to walk straight for a bit" he sighed as he sat down next to me "we might as well move the party to her"

Mason took off to find the other as I lent my head against Adrian. We sat in silence for a few minutes

"What's wrong?' I asked him

"Rose, what going on with you?" He asked "At court you freaked out about having one or two drinks and here you are trashed."

"Nothing, I'm just relaxing. It's the weekend! Am I not allowed to have fun?" I answered getting angry

"Of course you are, but you can't tell me you won't regret this in the morning"

"Well I'll deal with that in the morning, right now I just want to have fun and forget" I answered truthfully

I still had my head resting against his shoulder so he moved to wrap an arm around me,

"I was worried about you" he said softly

"Thanks" I said looking up at him, for a minute we just stared into each other's eyes slowly I moved to press my lips against his. He closed his eyes and moved his lips against mine softly. Before I could move into a more comfortable position I heard a branch snap and Adrian pulled away, looking towards the sound and the approach of our friends.

Amber it seemed was barely better then I was, though she could walk.

"Babe, were did you go out to?" she scream as soon as she saw me

I reached up and pulled her down next to her causing her to laugh.

"Got caught up with Mason, Sorry for worrying you" I answered also looking at Eddie who punched Mason on the shoulder with a disapproving "Dude".

And so we sat in the trees as Amber and Eddie filled us in on the scandal that Mason and I had missed. Slowly, Amber started to lose the energy in her voice and my head started clearing.

"Let's head back" I suggested and the 5 of us started our trek back. It was decided that Amber and I were too trashed to sneak back in so we would crash at Adrian's. The boy's pretty much had to carry us there and as soon as I was placed on the couch I was out.

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**So what do we think about this new Rose? Will it lead her into danger or is it just harmless fun? What are your thoughts on Amber now you've seen a bit more of her? What about Rose and Mason? Let me know!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey guys! Sorry for the delay i didnt realise i had this written and not posted! Today is my 22nd Birthday and as a present from y'all why not review? :P lol. Again sorry for the delay i'm working for the christmas season and have been doing like 9 hour days cosistently so i havn't had much time for anything other then work, food, family and sleep. Hope you like it! Promise to UD again before the New Year. SO EXCITED THOUGH LAST SACRIFICE IS OUT HERE TOMORROW!**

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And so for the second morning in a row I awoke on Adrian's couch with a killer hangover, but this time I was awoken to the smell of coffee and food. I cracked open an eye and saw Lissa and Christian walking through the door with a basket of food from the cafeteria. As I sat up I swayed and grabbed my head, groaning.

Lissa noticed me up and walked over, "oh god Rose what did you do to yourself last night?" she questioned eyes wide at my appearance "when Adrian txt me last night or should I say VERY early this morning saying you were crashing at his and I should come over and bring you guys food in the morning I certainly didn't think you'd look this bad!" again with her disapproving tone.

"Argh Lissa, please a little less disapproval through the bond please" I said back staggering to get up.

"Sorry Rose, but have you seen yourself?"

"I just got up, of course I haven't" I said but then slipped into her head and saw myself, my hair was messed up with twigs and leaves, my make up smeared and my tanned skin pale. I was still in my dress but wearing a pair of trackies that I had no memory of getting into. In short I looked like I got hit by a bus!

"Well damn" I said when I came back into my own head

"Geez Rose I'm not a damn mirror" Lissa grumbled "I'm setting up breakfast, have a shower and I'll wake the other two, but I'd hurry with the shower coz I can't guarantee the food will still be there when you get out" she smirked while saying this and pushed me towards the bathroom. I stumbled and almost fell; Christian chuckled while Lissa shook her head and went to start setting the table.

I quickly showered under the hot water and felt almost human, or dhampir I guess, again. Emerging from the bathroom in just a towel and a cloud of steam I made a beeline for the doughnuts.

"Oh thank god" Amber muttered as she pulled herself off her makeshift bed and towards the now free bathroom.

Adrian was already sitting at the table with Christian and Lissa, showered and well groomed.

"Well Little dhampir I must say while I love what your wearing, why are you wearing just a towel?" he was of course checking me out and had a slight smile to his voice but I was too busy shoveling down food to really care.

"…Don't…Haf…Any…Fing…elwse…" I said between bites

Lissa shook her head, laughing and handed me a bad with some of my clothing in it.

"Thanks babe" I said after swallowing "I'm using your room Adrian" I shouted back as I closed the door.

When I came out I was clothed and, apart from the hang over, felt pretty good.

"OMG Rose you didn't" was the first thing Lissa said as I came out, and I was confused,

"What didn't I do?" I asked

"Got with Mason" she answered laughing

I groaned again, "shit" I muttered sitting down at the table

"Told you you'd regret it" Adrian pointed out

"Afterwards! Geez thanks for that" I replied sarcastically then sighed "Whatever" I shrugged and grabbed another doughnut "I may as well have some fun while I can"

Before Lissa could say whatever it was she was about to, Amber came bursting out of the bathroom in the trackie I has left in there and a towel around her top, "Adrian can I borrow a top?" she asked as she reached over me to grab the last half of the last doughnut I was about to eat.

"HEY" I shouted as she took a bite and smiled at me,

"What" she said innocently

In the back ground Lissa was worried I may hurt my new friend, Christian was laughing and Adrian said "you don't mess with Rose and her food" but I was focused on getting my revenge

"oh not much" I said just as innocently as I reach up and grabbed the towel of her, she shrieked and dropped the remainder of the doughnut as her arms came up to cover her now bare breasts.

"ROSE!" she yelled but I just shoved the entire rest of the doughnut into my mouth and shrugged turning back to the table

Adrian and Christian were laughing and Lissa was covering Christian's eyes with a small smile on her lips,

"Rosemarie Hathaway that was not nice! Poor Amber, I packed two tops for Rose so you can take the one she isn't wearing it's in the basket in Adrian's room."

As she went off to get properly dressed, laughing along with the rest of us, Adrian yelled after her,

"I told you not to mess with Rose and her food"

When she came back, still wearing the tracking I had woken in I remembered to ask about them.

"Hey Adrian? Who put me in those trackies? Last thing I remember is…" I pause trying to think back "ummm walking towards your building in the tress and ummmm I think sitting on the couch and then nothing"

"yeah you passed out on the walk back so Mason carried you and put you on the couch but you were shivering, hardly surprising with the length of that dress" He raised his eyebrow at that. Damn he looked just like _he_ would have. I shoved the thought away as Adrian continued "and seeming as I gave Amber the thicker blanket Mason and I worked together to put them one you, which is a whole lot harder then what I usually do, which is take pant off girls"

I cracked up at this, so did the others

"Well thanks for caring" I said a little embarrassed "sorry I was so out of hand"

"Oh you weren't as bad as Amber, she passed out almost 10 minutes before we got here and Eddie had to carry her coz Mason and I were with you" We all laughed as Amber turned red and muttered a sorry.

After that we all had a nice breakfast, mostly filled with Adrian filling Lissa and Christian, and me and amber, in on what we did last night. Amber was horrified to find out she has made out with Jesse and let him touch her ass before Adrian had spotted her and saved her. After breakfast I texted Mason and Eddie asking if they wanted to hang and we spent the rest night together, recounting the party and watching another movie. I thought it might be weird with Mason but it wasn't. At first we kinda evaded looking at each other but after a quick talk of me saying sorry and him saying sorry and me explaining I wasn't out for anything serious and it was just some fun and him agreeing, though it seemed a little forced, that it was just a one time deal and nothing serious, we relaxed and everything was as if it hadn't happened.

With two hours until curfew I excused myself and headed to the gym, time for another grueling self training session.

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**Like it? Hate it? Let me know! I had someone tell me they didnt like this new rose i created? What do you think? Also Amber? Like her? Hate her? Again Let me know!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey sorry about the delay. i had written the next few chapters but the reviews asked me for some DPOV so i did and i got another idea from a review as well so i decided to take some time and write a new chapter. Sorry its not too long, im working like 10 hours a day atm with christmas and it just soooo hard to write after 10hours on your feet :P Enjoy and Review!**

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I couldn't stop thinking about her. It had only been a week and a bit and I missed her so much. My Guardian mask was now permanently on as my mind constantly replayed the last time I had seen her. Little thing like songs or character on TV would set me off and I would be sucked into a memory of her, struggling internally not to cry. I barely spoke to Tasha, to angry at what she had made me do.

After another week I couldn't handle not knowing and in a moment of weakness I called Alberta pretending to check up on Lissa but hoping to bring up my Roza as well.

"Guardian Petrov"

"Hi Alberta, Dimitri here. Just wanting to check in on my charge."

"All is good here Dimitri. No sighting of Strigoi anywhere near here and she seems happy and content with school."

"Okay, let me know if she needs me. And how is my protégé? Keeping herself out of trouble?" I silently begged that that was the case

"Rose? Well as far as I know she is fine. Her temper and attitude have spiked without you here but she is sticking to your training regime. If you ask me she's over doing it a little but I'm keeping an eye out on her to make sure she doesn't hurt herself or anyone else" Alberta chuckled a little at this. "Though she has been featured largely on the rumor mill this last week" Alberta said as an afterthought "I'm not sure if there's any truth in them and as she's training just as hard as she did before I'm inclined to not believe them but I will be keeping an eye on the situation."

"What's being said this time" I said this in a carefree almost joking way but I was desperate to know

"Oh nothing original, just the usual teen stuff. Anyway I'm needed on shift. I'll let keep you updated regarding your charge. Goodbye."

Curse her I thought as she hung up the phone. I called to try to find peace of mind only to become more worried. What was happening with my Roza?

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It was the weekend and I was drinking again. This time it was a dhampir only gathering taking place in the unused section of the dorms. It wasn't a party as we had mainly gathered to watch human sports on TV and drink. There were only about 20 of us and I was one of only 3 girls. I hadn't intended to be drinking, but once I started the numb feeling roped me in and the pain I had been carrying around dimmed, it felt so good to be without it. My tougher training mainly did the trick, blocking my hearts pain with physical pain from my over used muscles or bruises for fighting but alcohol worked best, it eliminated all pain and I could be free. I sat and watched and commented and talked all the while basking in the internal glow of being pain free. It felt nice to interact with people and not have to hide, to be looked at with want instead of rejection, to know if I wanted to be with anyone I could be and they would welcome me instead of push me away or deny their want.

Suddenly the alcohol wasn't working as well and I felt the pain break through, again I felt inadequate. I was stumbling my way back towards the in use part of the dorms and my bedroom when Mason stopped me.

"You okay?" he asked "saw you leaving and wanted to say goodnight and check up on you" he grinned in a nervous way that signaled his intentions hadn't been as innocent as he pretended.

I smiled my man eater smile and looked into his eyes; within I saw lust and suddenly I needed that feeling of being wanted as if it was air.

I pushed myself against him pushing my lips against his and he brought his hands to rest on my hip, figure digging in slightly. I slid my tongue along his bottom lip and as he opened his mouth attacked his with my own. The kiss turned intense, mouths fighting for dominance hands pushing and grabbing, as we tumbled down the hallway towards privacy. As we got thru the door into my room he pushed me back against the door. I hitched my legs around his waist and hoisted myself up, letting him sandwich me, giving in to the pleasure he was providing. His mouth left mine and trailed down my neck, kissing and biting, he ripped my t-shirt off me and his hand explored my chest thru my lacy black bra. The feeling of him grinding me against the door, lips on my throat and hands triggering the sensitive nerves in my breast combined threw me into a orgasm and I screamed out. Only problem was I also called out Dimitri's name.

"WHAT THE FUCK" Mason yelled pushing away and again was on my ass. "what did you just say?"

He looked pissed but then again I did just call out another guys name, "Nothing" I said, I was sober now and I could see the hurt that was mixed in with the anger. "Mase, come on" I tried to kiss him, anything was better that seeing his face.

"God Rose, you just screamed out your mentor name while you were with me, what make you think trying to kiss me would be okay!" he spat at me "DAMMIT I knew this was too good to be true" he said while punching a hole in my wall.

"Mase calm down! You'll hurt yourself!" I tried to grab his injured hand but he pulled away from me

"No, stay away from me" and with that he left.

Tears started pouring down my cheeks as I realized yet again, that my life sucked.

I woke up the next morning determined to talk to Mason and make it up to him. I waited til after breakfast and then went to knock on his door. When he answered he didn't look happy but then again he didn't look angry anymore so I hoped I could come out of this with our friendship still intact.

"Hey Mase, Can I come in?" I asked gingerly

"Yeah, whatever" he said backing away from the door so I could enter

"I'm really sorry Mase, about last night and last weekend too"

"Yeah well whatever, it's not like you didn't tell me it was just for fun last time." he said acting uninterested but I could tell he was by the way his hands were held

"No, really I am"

"Why?" he asked me

"Because I used you" I said looking down

"Not that I minded" he smirked "but I meant why did you say his name?"

I turned away, this was not what I expected, but I owed Mason the truth.

"Because I love him."

**Like it? Love it? Let me know! REVIEW it keeps me wanting to write!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hello guys, Merry Christmas**. **Sorry for not updating. i wrote this chapter, then rewrote it til it was perfect and then when i went to post it i was an old version! The new one hadnt saved! I was devastate coz i spent sooo long on it. So i've re written it. Its not as good i dont think.. BUT it'll have to do. The Comp i used doesnt have the best spell check so if something is spelt wrong i am sooo sorry! M scene below so those you dont want to read smut skip the m bit its clearly labelled!**

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And so, for the next few months, my life seemed to consist of training during the week and partying on the weekend, both to the same end, to forget him. Mason and I had made up sort of. He finally started to move on but he was still there for me, being the only one to truly know what was going on with me. Some night when things would be bad he would come and sit with me and rub my back while I cried. The one and only time I attempted to hurt myself he found me, stopped me, yelled bloody murder at me and literally knocked some sence into me. Some times I would spar with him, I was above him in skill level but I was helping him like _he_ had helped me train. I would make him work full out and every now and then I would purposely slip and let him hit me, he knew that I was using him and when every I did he would go ballistic but he still trained with me in the arvo's every day.

I had added an extra 15kg to my weight and could run double what I had. Combat class was still my favorite especially since I could now beat over half the Guardians that helped out. I had asked Alberta and the headmistress if I could be excused from unimportant classes after a few weeks back, those that didn't directly link with becoming a guardian to put in extra training. They agreed as long as the few classes I did I raised my grades. I found it easier when I was just the three classes to dedicate my attention and even thought my reputation as 'Wild Rose Hathaway' was spreading more and more, mostly helped along by the way I dressed, my newly amped attitude and a few drunken public makeout sessions with different boys that Mason, Adrian or Eddie had failed to scare away at the weekendly parties, my marks were up to A's in all.

My training timetable was hard, just the way I planned it. I did my morning run before classes, in my first break I worked on my flexibility and strength, the next break was with the dummies working on staking and punching. There was also a guardian watching over me to make sure I wasn't slacking or that I didn't hurt myself.

After lunch I worked with the guardians. I had a break then a class then another break so it was worked into the guardian schedule for a different advanced guardian to work with me for each break. I also helped the guardian in charge of the combat class and worked on improving the entire class. After school I worked with Mason and sometime Eddie, we were the three best there were and I was determined to help them so I would never lose them. Even after all this there was still that ache in my chest and I would still cry myself to sleep some nights thinking about him.

It was the 6th weekend back when I made my first huge mistake. Amber and I were close, even though Lissa was still my best friend and I would give my life for her she didn't really approve of all the partying I was doing. She thought I was out of control. I loved her but she didn't understand I was only doing what I needed to, to survive. I never told her the reason and never would just hoped that she would understand one day.

My weekends usually consisted on this; I would get together with the group on Fridays and we'd drink and then there was always a party on sat night that we would hit and if not we'd make one at Adrian's. Sunday was my alone day. Everyone knew this and after waking, most likely at Adrian's place, I would disappear around noon and no one would see me til breakfast on Monday. I didn't eat Sunday at all, only trained, hoping to make my mind stronger.

It was on Friday night and Lissa, Christain, Eddie, Mason, Amber, Adrain and I were over at Adrain and Amber managed to convince everyone to start a drinking game, which she usually did, which turned into truth or dare. We started with the usual dare of eat this and do a nudie run. It took a turn when, with I Kissed A Girl playing in the back ground, Adrian dared me too french kiss Amber for 30 seconds. I then dared Amber to kiss Eddie since she's admitted drunkenly to me the weekend before she had a small thing for him. And so I went until Amber dared me to make out Christian for 3 minutes. I didn't even think about the consequences as I plonked myself into his lap and started making out with him. When Amber signaled time up nothing seemed wrong everyone was laughing or so I thought, but if the bond hadn't been numbed by the alcohol I would have noticed Lissa was NOT laughing. But the game went on, I should have realized Lissa always picked truth, but I didn't and when dared by Mason to do a strip tease for them I did, all the way down to my lacy black semi see through underwear. Using my discarded clothing like a feather boa around everyone's neck I danced half naked in front of and on them. Falling every now and then on top of some one. It was after I had landed on Christan and commented that he was comfy and I didn't think I could stand up again that Lissa said she was tired and wanted to go to bed, Christain told her to wait for him to walk her home though he was way more drunk then she was. He had to pick me up and place me down on his now empty chair, while I pouted saying my comfy warm pillow was leaving. Everyone was laughing at our antics but Lissa was looking mad so I pushed Christian at her telling him to make sure she got home okay.

We continued playing, each dare involved less and less clothing and where of a more sexual nature, until I dared Amber and Eddie into a room for 7 minute in heaven and they never returned. Mason had passed out on the floor and I was preparing to crash on the couch when I made my second mistake of the night, Adrian wrapped an arm around my pulling me close and kissing me deeply. He pulled me into his room and we continued to make out on his bed.

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This was my no means the first make out session we had had but it heated up fast. I was pinned under him and his hand were roaming my body over my clothing as our tongues battled for dominance. He was kissing my neck and pulled the strap of my bra nd singlet down over my shoulder to have better assess. I moaned as his tongue touched a spot that sent tingles through me. It reminded me of my times with Dimitri, he had loved to kiss me there to hear my moan. Adrian pulled back a little, this was the part where I usually pulled away but tonight backed my the memory I wanted to forget and drown my self in the pleasure Adrian was providing. So instead I spurred us on, literally ripping his top off him. He responded by eagerly pulling both my top and bra off and moving his mouth slowly down my neck to my breasts sucking them hungrily. I moaned at the feeling his tongue was causing as it circles my nipple and flicked over the hard nub. I gripped his back pulling harder into me and before I knew it his hands where under my skirt touching me threw my panties. His finger tips barely grazed me and I squirmed under him whimpering for more as I trialed my nailed up and down his back. He pulled away to watch me with a smirk and as his finger entered me I let out a strangled 'Adrian' letting my head roll back. He started pumping in and out of me and I trust my hips to meet his hands pace, he slipping another finger inside me and used his thumb to rub the sensitive nub above. The mixture of his figure as well as his mouth on my breast was amazing and soon I was orgasming biting down on his neck to muffle the scream.

As the feeling started to fade I flipped us over so he was under me and slowly trailed kisses down his naked chest, pulling his pant down and exposing his member. I slowly started pumping him using my hands and after warming him up I lowered my mouth unto him. He cried out my name as I moved up and down until Adrian was thrusting into my mouth calling my name in between gasps and moans. After he'd come he pulled me back up and continued kissing me fiercely, this time removing my skirt and rubbing his hand all over me. Again he moved his mouth down me neck to my breast but instead of staying on them he continued down my side running his tounge in circles lingering on my hip bone and following the slight V of muscle down. As his tongue ran over the already swollen nub I jerked, this caused him to look up at me with his sexy smirk. "relax angel, I promise not to bite… much" and then he softly nipped at me and holding my hips down to the bed so I couldn't move. I never felt anything so amazing and I called out his name over and over again as I orgasmed. Adrian shifted away from me and reached into his bed side draws pulling out a condom and slipping it on. Somewhere in the back of my brain I knew I didn't want this. I was about to tell him but he entered me and all thoughts were forgotten. We rode each other hard and fast, occasionally switched position as we fort for dominance. It was as I felt my walls started to clamp around him that he whispered into my ear "I dare you to let me bite you" and I offered him my neck. He bit down just as my orgasm broke and the mixture of pain, pleasure and endorphins intensified it and I couldn't stop from screaming out. The fog of the bite in closed me and it was in this state that I thought of how I wish it was Dimitri with me and not Adrian. That was my last thought before passing out.

************M SCENE END**************

When I woke up I was ashamed. Adrian was still out and I slowly moved off the bed and into the shower. I could see the bite mark clearly on my skin as I stood naked in front of the mirror. I turned the water on hot as I tired to burn last night of my skin, in the end I sat in the bottom of the shower and cried. Once I could force myself to stop I dried my self and put on clean clothes. I had a stock pile in Adrian's room since I so often ended up passed out there. I tip toed passed Mason who was still on the floor and into the kitchen to grab a few panadol for the killer hang over and snuck out of the building, heading for the one place I though I could find comfort. I was wrong.

**Like it? Love it? LET ME KNOW! What do you think of adrian? Who was she goin to? Mason? Christian? Lissa? Amber? To the gym to train? Let me know your thought PLEASE i felt very strange about writting a sex scene so let me know what you thought of it?**


	12. Chapter 12

_Hey sorry about the update… I thought I had updated this chapter, but turns out I didn't! SORRY… _D. Kelly _guessed right so congrates to her… Let me know what your thinking of this chapter, I tried really hard to make it seem realisitic and dramatic. Happy 2011 to all my readers!'_

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I knocked on her door and tried to check the bond but Lissa was blocking me. As the door opened I was confronted with a pissed of Lissa.

"Rosemarie Hathaway you have some nerve showing up at my door after you made out with my boyfriend last night!" she yelled at me. I looked at her confused and then I remembered the dare! OH MY GOD!

"Lissa, please, it was just a dare" I begged "it wasn't anything serious, you know I don't like sparky!"

"I don't know what is going on with you but I can't just sit back and watch you crash and burn every weekend anymore! I'm out. I tried being supportive and look what it gets me! I stuck around coz I was worried but apparently you more interested in my boyfriend than our friendship!" she scream the last part at me.

"Please, please Lissa, I need you!' I dropped to the floor begging her

"Well I can't even look at you right now. Why don't you try your new best friend Amber, or is she too hung over" she turned and slammed the door leaving me crying on my knees begging over and over again for her to openn the door.

I don't know how long I sat there crying for her but soon Adrian turned up.

"No, I don't want to see you" I screamed at him and ran from the building towards my room.

I was on my bed crying when he came in,

"whats wrong babe?" he asked sitting down next to me. I didn't answer I just kept crying for all the shit I've done in the last weeks. Trying to comfort me he swept the hair off my face and neck and that's when he saw what Lissa had missed.

"Shit" he swore gently touching it "Did I do that?"

"Who else would have?" I spat back at him

He put his hand over the bite mark and I felt the hot cold glow of spirit healing when he was done he pulled me into his lap

"I'm so sorry about last night! I feel so horrible about it. Lissa told me when I first started after you how you were a virgin. I can't believe I took your first time like that." He seemed upset about that I didn't have the strength to tell him that it hadn't been my first time, that would just dreg up memories of _him _and I didn't need them as well. My focus here was Lissa.

"I don't even care about that right now Adrian. She hates me! I never meant to hurt her." I cried harder at the thought of how much I had hurt Lissa. And I could feel it through the bond now as she too was crying.

"Don't worry babe. It'll work out" he said hugging me. I just kept crying

"What have you been hiding from?" he asked quietly into my hair

I was so shocked by this, that he had notice or cared enough to wonder that I responded without thinking. "_Him_" I said and my crying increased

"Your mentor? The guy I saw you with at the ski resort, right? I could tell you two had something but I guess I thought I was wrong when he didn't come back with you" his word hit some sore points.

"you and me both" I answer bitterly

Adrian kept stroking my hair and murming to me and after a while I fell asleep in his arms and when I awoke he was gone. I took a shower and sat at the bottom thinking. After a long time I decided to closed my heart off. If Lissa didn't care then I wouldn't care, just like with Dimitri.'

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In his room Christian was pacing. He couldn't believe what Rose had turned into. He hated that he had made out with her, that he had liked it and that it had hurt Lissa. They were all drunk and it was just a bit of fun but Lissa was hurting and so apparently was Rose. Not that he cared to the extent that he did Lissa but even though they fought all the time he still cared, just as she would still put her lif on the line to protect him if need be.

He thought back to how she used to be. So dedicated, not that she wasn't dedicated now but she put herself through hell training during the week ignoring the world, it seemed she was no longer dedicated to just lissa, she used protected Lissa subconsciously always around her, now she was dedicated to just being a good guardian/fighter. She also never used to drink.

Then she came back from the ski resort and suddenly she was out of control. Lissa had been worried for weeks as all Rose did was train and drink. She was slowly killing herself and no-one was sure why.

He spent most of the day thinking about the situation, abut it kept coming back to Rose. Something most have happened, and maybe if he figure that out the rest would work out to. What had changed he wondered? Then it clicked…Dimitri! Dimitri had left! Rose must be acting out in hopes of getting her mentor back, or because she felt abandoned? Her mum was more of a mental figure then an actual presence and she had no father, Dimitri must have been the closest thing she had to a parental figure, or an adult who cared. Christian shook himself, he was way over analying this, may Dimitri just had a way of supressing Roses worst habbits and now the she demon inside was lose.

He would call his Aunty and talk to her about it. Maybe she could come for a visit? There was a fuction for the graduating year scheduled for this weekend. A Karoke Party that Lissa had had a huge hand in organising. It would be the perfect cover! As he worked through his mental plan he rang lissa and when she didn't answer he sighed. Dimitri had better be able to control his protigee coz he wasn't sure any of them would survive it otherwise.

**Let me know? how do you think the scene with Lissa and Rose went? What about Adrian? And did you like christians ramblings? i thought the last sentence was pretty funny but thats just me, REVIEW my friend!**


	13. Chapter 13

**Hi guys, it's been soo long I know. I've been in a bit of a downwards twist and you don't even want to know the horrible things I've done to poor Rose, Dimitri and even Lissa, trying to write the rest of the story. This is just a short update to see if I've gotten my rhythm back so please REVIEW and tell me what you think, hopefully I'm totally out of my funk but if the story isn't as good as before I apologize. **

Tasha's phone rang and I ignored it, just like I've been ignoring everything that didn't have to do with Roza or protecting Tasha's life. It had been months since I saw her, heard her voice, smelt her scent, looked into those beautiful brown eyes of hers, ran my hands threw her silky hair, felt the softness of her skin on mine…. My mind drifted off into a day dream of her, as it always does and all the while my heart hurt.

I called the Academy fortnightly to 'check' on the princess and subtly my Roza, and each time the news was more and more depressing. During the week Alberta reported that all Roza did was train, with a few classes thrown into the mix but during the weekend it seemed Roza was spiraling out of control, but there was never any proof, other than the rumors.

The only reason I was getting this much information was because Alberta was worried about her. She would ask me for my thought on how to help, or how to get Roza to open up to her, but with each call Alberta was growing more frustrated and scared. She blamed Adrian, who Rose seemed permanently stuck to during weekends, as being a bad influence on not only Roza but Lissa as well. She also blamed a student I had never met, Amber, who had transferred after I left. It seemed Roza was part of a triangle with her and Adrian on the weekends, and then was never far from the Princesses side during the week.

Often Alberta would speculate about the reason for this massive change in Roza. Her favorite theory was that Roza was trying so hard to be the perfect guardian for the Princess, with the extra training and discipline during the week, that come the weekend she was so blown out that she let herself be swept up in the bad behavior of her new friends. It was kinda sweet how Alberta tried to remove the blame from Roza, but I knew that it was all Roza, as much as I wish it wasn't.

My musings were interrupted by Tasha coming into the room.

"Dimitri, we are going back to the Academy this weekend" she stated and I just nodded keeping my guardian mask in place to hide the mixture of emotions this caused within me.

"I just got a call from Christian begging me to come to a graduation function Lissa has been organizing. Apparently things have been getting out of control since you left, especially Rose" as she said her name she looked out the window behind me and slightly shook her head. I wondered what that was about but before I could ask she was looking back at me.

"I think I might have been wrong about you two. Maybe she does need you as much as you seem to need her. I'm Sorry" Her eye started to tear up as she said this and I could tell there was more then she was letting on.

"What's going on Tasha?" I asked steering her towards the couched and as we sat down I took her hand.

"I'm so so so sorry Dimka" she sobbed leaning into my shoulder and I held her as she cried. When she managed to control herself, she pulled away slightly, looked into my eyes and spoke,

"I'm sorry I thought you would do to her what Cal did to me" and as soon as she said that name it all made sense.

I hugged her to me again as she cried more.

Cal had been a teacher at St Arthur where she had gone to school. When she was 16 he started to show interest in her, professionally at first, as he was the literature teacher and she used to write the most amazing poems. He was young for a teacher, the same age I was now, but she was younger than Roza and a lot more naïve. Her older sister, Christian mother, had everything, the suitors, the high marks, the beauty (or so she thought) and most of her parents attention. She was, for once, the sole receiver of the attention. He started asking her to spend time with him, writing or reading her works and listening to some of his. His poetry was tainted with love and mentions of blonde beauties and when he started making more personal and physical advances, she thought them to be in love. It started slowly, stolen kisses in hiding spots, gentle caresses in secret and she fell more in love with him as time when on. She gave him her virginity and they were together for 6 months before he started to distance himself. Soon she was barely seeing him except for when they slept together. That's when she noticed he was 'tutoring' another girl from the year above, a girl with a reputation of sleeping around. She asked him about it and he told her the school made him as she was failing. She believed him and accepted the new arrangement as once she was finished school he promised to take her away and they could spend all day together them. The week before the end of the year she went to his room, he was meant to be tutoring in the library and she wanted to set up a surprise for him. As she opened the door she found them together with his dick in her mouth. He opened his eyes shocked at the interruption but upon seeing her closed them and urged the girl to keep going. She had been devastated, broken and depressed for the last week she didn't eat and barely slept but cried all the time.

When she went home she was ashamed and hurt. She felt abused and fooled and barely left her room. Soon the anger came and she hated him for taking advantage for her. She told her mother in the hopes of her helping her tell the school to have action taken against him but her mother was neither compassionate nor kind. She screamed at her telling her she was a slut and stupid and it was her own fault she was tricked as well as that fact that her sister would never have fallen for such a trick as she was smart and pure. She forbid her to tell the school, as it would only disgrace the family, and forced her back the next school year.

I had forgotten about his betrayal of her and how deeply it had hurt her. No wonder she tried her hardest to keep me from Roza.

"I'm not him Tasha, I truly love Roza" I said while rubbing her back, "you need to let that pain go and try to trust in 'man'kind again" I told her gently.

"I just never want to be hurt like that again" she sobbed

"I know, but not every man will hurt you, there will be a man out there for you and you can't find him if your hiding" I gently scolded her "I promise to never hurt Roza like Cal hurt you, okay?"

"Please don't" she almost begged "she's been through too much already"

I just held her rubbing her back until she fell asleep, I couldn't even be offended she would think me capable of such cruelty as Cal had really squired her point of view of love. I sat there thinking of how much he had hurt her and what I would do to him if I ever meet him. I fell asleep, slightly smiling at the imaged of torture in my head, completely forgetting Tasha had information on Rose.

**There you go, a little insight into Tasha and why she pulled Dimitri away from Rose. Sorry if there was a sentence that was too graphic for you, I couldn't decided if I should leave it or not but I think it showed just how much of an asshole Cal is. On the plus side the delay was good coz a song came out here that I think is perfect for this story and way better than the one I had chosen, but SORRY GUYS! Also I have a poll on my profile to see which slutty song Rose will be singing, so vote! As always tell me what you think?**


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